I’ve come to realize I’ll never make new friends

February 5, 2013 4 Comments »
I’ve come to realize I’ll never make new friends

It’s tough moving to a new place.

I moved to Georgia in 2006 from my hometown Philly and before that I spent my early years after high school in Virginia where I attended and graduated from Norfolk State University. Coming back home to Philly was easy. My friends were there, family was there and it’s like settling into an old shoe when you go back home. It just feels right. The shoe hugs and comforts your feet just like an old friend and family will. And even if you haven’t worn those shoes in a long time, they still embrace your feet and welcome you back.

With that said, I miss my old friends in Philly. I’ve found here in Atlanta that although I’ve made some friends, they really aren’t “friends.” My friends understand me. I’m a straight-up, no chaser type of gal and my TRUE friends are NEVER bothered by what I say or how I say it. THEY GET ME. My husband GETS ME. He is indeed my BEST friend.

My husband is actually my best friend. After listening to a lot of women on Facebook I’ve come to realize that my

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husband is kinda rare. He is a really nice guy. I’m the firecracker and he’s the water to douse my flames. LOL

We are actually VERY close and he is a very good friend to me besides being a great husband. If my husband up and left me today I would still want to be good friends with him. Yep it’s like that! But uh, he’s not going anywhere!

He washes clothes, cooks, gets the kids ready for bed, cleans as much as I do and he takes care of us wholly. And he allows me to pursue my own thing and doesn’t complain that he pays ALL of our bills every month — mortgage and all — and he is the big ole’ breadwinner. He just does what he is supposed to do.

And what makes him even MORE rare? When he gets paid, I take care of all the money, all of the household bills and everything. He hands that paycheck over to me- No questions asked. I know a lot of women who lead separate financial lives with their mate. Their husband doesn’t let them even go near the bank account! Ha! Not with me! My husband doesn’t care as long as the electric is on, water is running and there are no foreclosure notes in the mail! He trusts me and I pay everything like I should (and spend a little on things I want, hee-hee).

Now that’s what I call a GOOD man. Rudy is just like that. Really easy going and I LOVE every bit of it!  It makes for an easy life. And after all the knuckleheads I dated over the years, thankfully he came to the rescue and I’ve had a good life with him for 12 solid years. He doesn’t drink alcohol, AT ALL! So he never hangs out with the guys at the bar. I couldn’t be happier that he is loving, caring and an easy going guy. And if I ask for something, whether a Range Rover or a new house, he will do his best to get it for me.To give you some perspective on my man — in 2006 Rudy left a GOOD job he worked at the City of Philadelphia for 16 years all because I said I wanted to move to Atlanta! Now how many men you know would risk their pension and everything else because their wife wanted to up and move? Yeah, Rudy did it. That’s the kind of guy I have. He supports everything I do and I support him. Whether I want to write a book or open a diaper bank, Rudy encourages and supports me fully. And I work hard to be a very loving, caring wife to him. He deserves every bit of it. And that’s why we have 12 years in and giggle and love each other like we are kids in high school.

Still with all his greatness, I need and want my girl time with my girlfriends. But I see it’s not gonna happen here in Atlanta. Don’t get me wrong, my husband is ALL I need to get by! But I’m a sociable person and enjoy the company of my girlfriends.

But in this new place, I haven’t found friends like the ones I have back home in Philly.  I wonder why is that? Is Atlanta a place filled with fakes and phonies who just want to get in your business to talk behind your back?You can see the cattiness on The Real Housewives of Atlanta. People claim to be friends only to later do you in. I don’t play those types of games. I want friends I can call and count on. Friends I can confide in and when they are mad at me, they will pick up the phone to tell me and not blast me on Facebook. Those are people I call friends.

I salute my real friends back home who love and adore me and I love and adore them. They care about me and they can call me and tell me what’s troubling them and I take it to the grave and I can call them and tell them anything and that’s a conversation that stays between us.

I’m sad I’ll never find good friends in Atlanta that really love me like the old ones, but today I want to shout out my REAL, TRUE HOMEGIRLS who I can call at anytime and they are there for me no matter what and this includes my mom and my aunts!

I LOVE YOU!

Janice (my mom and TRUEST homegirl who knows everything and got my back no matter what! Ride or die chick!)



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Me and my mom Janice

Aunt Candy (Love you my darling for ALWAYS being there for me no matter what!)



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Me and my Aunt Candy

Aunt Punkin (A true ride or die chick who got my back no matter what!)



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Me and Aunt Punkin

Daaimah Poole (My homie. Love you and glad to call you a friend I can trust and talk to whenever! Appreciate you! Wish I was in Philly!)



Me and Daaimah



Me and Daaimah

Jenece Bond-Horton (I am there for you and you are always there for me! I wish I was back in Philly so we could be together more! Love ya!)







me and jenece

Tikia Percell (My sista from another mister! Can call you at anytime and love you dearly!)



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Me and my friend Tikia Percell

Nia Austin (We don’t even talk often but I can pick up the phone and we begin where we left off! Someone I trust and adore!) Sarun Thornton (Love you, adore you, Trust you! Enough said!)



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Nia, Me and Sarun

Janet Woodson (My sister from the same mister, different moms. Love you sis and you are someone I can share anything with! Wish I didn’t have to move away. Miss you!)

And there are so many more friends I don’t talk to often but if I put the call out they would be there for me. My old, around the way friends like Nikia Duren, and Tracey Carter or my high school friends like Sharisse Stanton and Wanda Pierce or college friends like Beverly Johnson and Stephanie Crockett. These ladies I trust, appreciate and adore. They got my back. And we may even fuss and fight. But we come back together and STILL remain as friends!

In six years of living here I have never felt so homesick, but a situation yesterday really prompted me to feel this way and realize that I truly miss my girlfriends. The ones who LOVE me unconditionally. Who know me and don’t condemn me for anything. I miss and LOVE you all and today just wanted to dedicate this blog post to you.*Tear*

Thank you friends.

Are you a mom who have found that you can’t find new friends in a new place? I’d love to hear about it.

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4 Comments

  1. Jewel February 5, 2013 at 12:30 pm -

    Kia,

    I left the DC area and felt the exact same way that you do. But, over just the last few years, I’ve found girlfriends like I had back home. I finally found my niche. It took some doing but I have the best circle of local friends now!

  2. cincomom February 5, 2013 at 12:44 pm -

    I hope that happens with me Jewel. I really would love to have a good circle of friends here in Atlanta, but I don’t know if Atlanta ladies know HOW to be a good friend. Look at their example, THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF ATLANTA! LOL Thanks for commenting Jewel xoxo!

  3. Faith February 5, 2013 at 5:37 pm -

    I am from Philly too, and most days I just want to go home. I hope it gets better for you.

  4. cincomom February 5, 2013 at 5:59 pm -

    Aww thanks Faith!